I’m back again (cue rapturous applause).
Back on here; back in the UK; back to work – tomorrow. Had a great holiday. A real mix of adventuring escapades and social events. A well worthwhile fortnight. I still haven’t tried scuba diving though as I may be allergic to the wetsuit – trying to confirm this beforehand…
Anyway, to the topic at hand. The last thought I mentioned in the previous blog led to nothing; I never met the young woman.
Overall, the negative side of my trip was couple saturation. The place seemed to be drowning in young couples and families… I don’t know if it always has been and you just notice it more in this mindset. Regardless, it does feel a little like life’s squashing you against a grimy shop window grunting “You want one of those? Do ya? Huh?” All you can see through the scratched glass is a sea of loved up couples. Before you can answer, life pulls you away and throws you to the ground laughing: “Well you ain’t gunna have one! Now get lost loser.”
My attitude to online dating has in fact worsened since the last entry (impossible, you say?) Whilst abroad, I struck up a conversation with an attractive, seemingly intelligent, Catholic woman who lived even further north in England. A couple of messages exchanged, I was just getting excited and then POW. Radio silence. Zippo. Off the radar.
Of course, this is nothing new. It led me to various online articles declaring how so many men forfeit online dating because they simply are ignored. Women, on the other hand, receive too much attention and much of it uncalled for, crude and sometimes harassing. I can picture women having to sift through their inbox as a chore but frankly (and perhaps incorrectly) it doesn’t seem as terrible as that abject abyss of silence. In particular, I know many nerds (who I do count myself amongst) who craft and sculpt messages only to receive nothing?!
I have happily resorted to online dating these past few years mainly because I would like to meet someone whilst both young. Also, I don’t really meet any women who are ever attracted to me outside so this is my attempt at channelling my own fate. Thus far, it would appear to be failing.
There have also been a few other thoughts creeping in about vocation. I am a devout Catholic believer and have never really grasped the concept of a priest’s calling; I see it as intensely personal. How do I know whether this is a sign or not? Well I guess, it would have to be followed by other signs if the big man realises I’m not understanding.
On that note, I have to air a bug-bear of mine. On what is likely my favourite online dating site (Catholic Match) there is a series of questions designed to “test” your Catholicity. Abortion, contraception, sex in marriage, papal infallibility and more are among the survey’s choices. Then, it decorates your profile with a few of your answers. As a fully-doctrinified Catholic, I’m with the Church on these issues. So what am I to think when I see what would appear to be an amazing person, with the answer “no” to “belief in sex within marriage?” What are you? A half-Catholic? A semi-serious Catholic? An almost lapsed Catholic? An I’ve-been-cheated-on-too-many-times-so-here-I-am Catholic? Frankly, these things are like mental carousels. News items are flying around the net at the moment declaring how porn dulls a man’s brain by providing the “reward” too quickly, not to speak of the warping of real-life bedroom antics. In that case, what on earth must online dating do to a (decent) man’s mind? Women and feminists can see the patriarchy in everything they wish to identify but as a gentleman online who doesn’t send messages in text language, doesn’t involve crudities or remarks on a lady’s figure instantly and chooses to try and engage with a person based on her hobbies, interests and personalities, there is no room. The end of the road for the kind gentleman and likely the “nice guy” too.
As of tomorrow, I will be returning to work and re-training this year with the hope of qualifying as a secondary school teacher. I hope to have chance to update this blog before Christmas, but we’ll see.