Merry Christmas, everyone – hope you’ve had a good one, and are looking forward to the change of year too. Now, I enjoy a drink as much as the next man, particularly in good company, but all these festive periods are about joining with loved ones (for me at any rate).
We have quite a small family unit here (4 of us) and it makes for small gatherings, which isn’t a problem; however, time keeps ticking and both my parents are beginning to show the small signs of aging – little loss of hearing, stiff joints, more aches and pains etc. I don’t know if it’s normal or not, but these sort of things force me to face my fear that they could (and obviously will) leave one day. Without sounding callous, it’s not their passing that frightens me, it’s the idea that a black hole of loneliness awaits me afterwards.
For instance, I’ve been pretty unwell over this Christmas period (didn’t make Midnight Mass) and have barely got out of the house. I’ve spent most of the season coughing into a now-diseased handkerchief and doing my very best to contain whatever germs I’m carrying. I’ve been able to rely on the kindness of my parents and family for help through it all. But what fills this void when they’re gone, or very simply, if you’re single and alone? Unwell, in need of help. Friends could help, but they’ll each have their own obligations in the form of families and commitments.
Meanwhile, an update, my old flame (if you could call her that, after a couple of dates!) got in touch again just before Christmas – do you know why? She wanted tips on what to buy someone “she’s currently seeing.” Who just happens to have very similar interests to me.
Just today, I was scrolling through YouTube and ended up on a video explaining 10 potential reasons why (as a man) you could be single. Hilariously, BOTH being too well-mannered and too ill-mannered were on the list. Ain’t that just glorious? I really am starting to think I’m a time-lost Victorian; I’m still the fella who opens doors for women (without eyeing up their backsides), offers my coat and pulls out chairs in restaurants. Anyways, the most accurate part of the video was probably the recurring idea of “shyness” being to blame. I’m not the most confident of people, though neither am I the least. It’s the modern setting of it all that I despise. If you do lock eyes with a woman in town on a night out, even if she’s reciprocating the smouldering looks, there’s more chance than not that A) she’s probably had a few drinks and B) she has one thing on her mind now, just like every other man in the establishment probably does too.
Do any of you think shyness is that big a problem? Have you found any ways of counteracting it? Do you simply go to the right places to find like-minded people? Do get in touch, either through the comments, or as always drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org
Cheers again, have a grand 2014